For sixteen years, I wanted almost nothing to do with her. I was cordial at best, and ignored her at worst. Why? A grudge. One I clutched as though my life depended on it. Perhaps a better way to say it is that my resentments and anger had a death grip on me. I no longer controlled them, but allowed them to run loose and wreak havoc in my relationships.
I see now where my immature thinking was seriously flawed, and I mourn the time I lost with her. Seven years ago, I decided to get to know Grandma, and I have never been sorry. She was a wonderful woman with lots of funny little quirks, like we all have. We went to the movies, out to lunch, hit a thrift store or two. I did some chores for her, and we went through family photo albums together.
She was a dear woman with a wonderful sense of humor, and she made my life richer. The most important lessons Grandma taught she never spoke. She just lived them out in front of me--Let go. Let go of imaginary ideas and misunderstandings. Forgive, because people are important. Laugh whenever you can. No matter how hard life gets, press on.
My grandma passed away this week, but what I learned through my experiences with her will stay with me forever as treasures I never let go. Our lives are nothing more than a whisper in the wind when compared with eternity. We have only a little time to impact future generations, and Grandma had a huge impact on me.
Though Grandma lived 95 years, I knew her for seven. I would love to go back, get over myself sooner, and know her better. I choose instead to be thankful for the time and experiences we did have together. They changed my life.
When have you been thankful you worked through anger and resentment?
This is my top blog post for December. If you would like to share yours, you can do so at Blog Schmog by Jessie Gunderson.